What would a therapist have to say about this article?
Is it a bit messed up to look at these killers as sexy? Maybe, but who can blame us when we’ve got such hunks running around in these movies? We’re not here to judge, that’s for your therapist. In this list we’ll be narrowing down the top five horror movie villains that could chase me with an axe any day.
5. Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th
While we don’t get to see this hulking figure of a man until the second Friday the 13th, Jason Voorhees is the strong and silent type. He’s typically played by the tallest, broadest actor that casting can get their hands on. For a first date, Jason Voorhees might take you on a walk around Crystal Lake. Just ignore the screams of the campers, they’re just playing around.
4. Tiffany Valentine from Bride of Chucky
Somewhere after the first sequel of Child’s Play these movies got annoyingly campy and silly. However, they had a few redeeming factors. One of those was definitely the inclusion of Jennifer Tilley as Tiffany Valentine. She’s insane, funny, and absolutely gorgeous. For a first date, she’d expect you to take her to a nice restaurant and then most likely brutally murder a member of the waitstaff. It’s the price of love.
There is no specific film for this fanged man. There are hundreds of movies about or including Dracula, and therefore there are hundreds of depictions of him that are deadly sexy. Anything from Christopher Lee’s performance as him in the Hammer Films Dracula series to the animated version of Dracula in Castlevania are beautiful and terrifying. For a first date Dracula would take you on a moonlit picnic, but sadly, you’re the meal.
2. Patrick Bateman from American Psycho
Patrick Bateman is sadistic, cruel, and uncaring in his murderous rampage, but damn his skincare has him glowing. The casting choice for this one was sure to have people falling in love with this killer, despite him being the most malicious on our list. A first date with Patrick Bateman would include going to the trendiest restaurant in town and comparing business cards. Just don’t have a more impressive one than Patrick.
1. Candyman from Candyman
Candyman is a truly fascinating movie about race and social classes, but it also has the most beautiful villain. Even a chest full of bees and a hook for a hand can not take away from Candyman’s soft voice and apparent devotion to his love. A first date with Candyman would probably involve you promising to be his forever and then joining him in the afterlife. A little intense, but creepily romantic.
That’s all for our list! Do you agree with our villains? Let us know if we should have included anyone else in the comments.
By Joey Warren